May 14, 2018, Monday

So here I am again, slowly getting the knack of doing this when I found out my other blog Memories can be continued, but decided to keep on with this one for the time being.

Life continues, wake up and say, well hello world I'm still here.  Though speaking of here, here is an apartment in a Seniors Residence...well some of us are not so lucky, of course they have gone to apparently a better place, they say (i.e. heaven)..but some of us are not doing too well in this residence.  Apparently the owners have decided to move people to the other Floralies, rather than letting them stay in this one, the other is in LaSalle, this one is in Lachine...the owners are now moving people from the fifth floor in Tower A. to Lasalle to make the floor special for nursing care, making smaller apts. and rooms...letting the residents know only days before they have to move, In fact one man found out Friday, and was moved out Sunday.

Well they better not count on my friend Letty, who is or was the first woman minister in Canada for the Anglican Church..She was moved to the 5th from the 4th floor last year..and this year here she has to move from the 5th here in Lachine to LaSalle, well, she does not want to go.   Life has been misery, she is partially blind, and has just taken lessons from MAB in how to walk in the neighbourhood, not to mention that she has a friend who can pick her up for church, and many other benefits living in Lachine, mainly The TeaPot..which takes her shopping, gives her odd volunteer jobs which she loves.. 

The powers that be here at the Floralies, did not inform her only by chance her social worker, heard from another source in the building and asked her did she know the 5th floor residents were being moved.  Well Lettie although being shocked went in action, called McGill Law for Aging, and the Gazette, etc. Although she is not happy with what's happening she is doing something and still told the director.  The Director will have her taken to the residence in LaSalle to see that it is as good if not better than her own place..  Then in the afternoon tomorrow she will check out another residence here in Lachine..The Belvedere.  So stay tuned for the next episode of This side of Eighty Five to find out the trials and tribulations of my dear friend Lettie.

supposed to be blogging on The Other Side of Eighty five..it's crazy can't find how to do that...anway, I'm slowly getting at the wrong side of 85, as I make some really off the wall decisions like to change my desk and keep an old shelf instead...yuck the place is a mess.   I'm waiting for Valerie to come with the old shelves from my house...I'm waiting for the concierge to come and take away one desk, I need to move the other desk, need to put computer on it..it's small, what was I thinking...

Oh for the peace and quiet of not having a ton of stuff to put away now...and where am I going to put it all..I'm also waiting for Val and Brandon to come to bring my old shelves...I'm rethinking, and I think this is a bad idea...   blaaah.


So I will look for my other blog, and go madder....

Saturday, May 19, 2017...I'm kind of late with my most recent visit with Alma, which was last Monday...will be going again this Monday..but just want to put a few thoughts down while I have them in mind.  

I collected over 600$ so far for the Alzheimer's WALK  this money along with all the other monies collected I hope will go for research for a cure...this of course is top priority..Why I'm talking about this is because one of my friends has been going through a really rough time with her cousin who had the disease of dementia..not all dementia is Alzheimer's but all dementia is a maddening thing to encounter when one has to think of ways to help.  Her cousin died and although it is sad, it is also what her cousin wanted...to die.  How terrible and sad an ending.

Therefore, my friend is so insistent that whatever monies are collected should absolutely go to research and CURE.  Well of course, but it is so important too that the $$$ go to help the Alzheimer Association help the CARE GIVERS... She would have benefited by going to a group meeting, her thoughts and ideas along with the other care givers that are in the group the support and exchange of problems and how to solve them are a real blessing to the people in the group.

 I for one have been in an Alzheimer Support Group..It was, for me, so important..  It must have been to the people in the group as well, because...that is how I came to know ALMA...Even though I am no longer looking after Mac..as his caregiver.  Alma's daughter is her Care Giver, I met her at our Alzheimer Group..she along with 7 others in the group have kept together.  We meet about once a month..in this group, there are now 3 of us who no longer have the sick person in our lives..but we meet to help the others, to listen to their lives, and give support, In my case I give my support by helping Alma which gives her daughter who was my fellow Care Giver a break.

Not only that, but she remembers Mac, she can help me at times too, as I sometimes slide into a kind of sad time wishing he was here but forgetting how his disease made him so unable to understand what's going on.  This is the same scenario that we see with Alma.  When I went to see her last Monday, she was in her room sitting in her wheelchair, folding very very carefully, a pair of pullups.(kind of diaper she wears)  She then put them in a purse and then in the drawer.  Saying well that's done, but what do I do with those things anyway.

As I pushed her wheelchair out of her room, she said, "now just where are we dear".  I said, you are at the Bayview Residence, in your apartment, It's. nice right??  But now we are going to your Art Group.   "oh we are??"   and so we did our project.  Which was to stamp some nice flowers or animals from a stamper pad unto cards..making Thank You's...  Who are we thanking said Alma, and Why...good questions.  Turns out we were thanking the art suppliers..She did a lovely job of stamping a cat, a kind of cougar, and a beautiful flower on three different cards....coloring them and discussing with me just how they should be placed on the card.  She suggested how I should put additional touches so she could color them in, a kind of palm tree, a kind of doorway around the cougar, and leaves around the flower.    We then put three tiny plants into tiny glass cups Those were the gifts that went with the cards...I thought this was a super project.  Most of the residents there enjoyed the whole process, Many thanks should go to the young girl (forgotten her name) who leads the class.

Well as we were leaving the class I said to Alma, let's look at your work one more time before it is taken away to give to the suppliers..That was within five minutes after she finished...she looked at everything carefully, and said...Those cards and plants are very nice, who did that, and where are they going.  All things are so "right now",  no memory, no thoughts...just as I was feeling a bit depressed about this..Alma said.  Isn't that MY JACKIE...and it was, Jackie is her daughter...My heart lightened as I waved to Jackie.  Hurrah what a wonderful memory...and a good end to our day together.

Monday May 1, 207

Another Art Project...Alma was on-target most of the time I was with her.  This project consisted of each person having a kind of aluminum cake pan filled with of all things....Shaving Cream...Alma had to take an eye dropper and fill it with her choice of food colorings  red, blue, green, or yellow.  Then drop it in different places on the Shaving Cream...which was sticking up in waves..  When she had just about covered the whole pan of shaving cream, she had to take a thin stick and weave it making all the colors join in a beautiful combination.  After came the piece de resistance..ok...a piece of art paper about 8 by 10, put it on carefully then peel it off, making all the colors stick to the paper.  Eventually the colors will melt on the paper in a lovely way and dry.  The next step will be to cut the paper in strips cover with clear vinyl put a hole in put a ribbon through and voila   several lovely book marks, or psychodelic colored paintings...

We read words in a crossword puzzle today, but it didn't mean anything to Alma, so maybe next time, one never knows when she is on or off...She was clearly happy and I took a couple of pictures and she looks great smiling away, I should try to get some pictures on this blog, but really don't know how to do this.  We had our tea, and cookies...and as usual looked out the window..this week the weather was not so cooperative so no outdoor activity...but watching the wind on the lake and the trees was a pleasure...this as I mention so often is a saving grace for those with dementia,  They can certainly be on target when they look at the scene wherever they are.

The place she is in great, the aides are happy, and the place is clean and quite a pleasure in that it is bright, with great pictures, and colorful walls, many windows, and last but not least a great view when one looks out the windows..most looking over the lake across the road. the toad tree lined and birds flying over and down.  Just Lovely.

There was nothing serious to spoil the day.  all went well, and as usual, she is so on target even with her time for the bathroom, and that's when I leave, an attendant takes her and I make sure to leave some cookies in her room and off I go, feeling well - not exactly happy, as who can be happy when we see one who does not have full understanding of their place and self...but it was as close as possible to a happy day for both of us.

The Walk for Alzheimer's is coming up on May 28 in Montreal, Will be asking for monetary support for this when I join the walk...Hoping I can raise a good amount...but when oh when will the break through come..and the cure for Alzheimer's happens...let's hope in our time..

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Well it flew by, the 2 hours assisting Alma my friend with the big A.  The art project was definitely the reason, which was filling in a series of wavy segments with different colours then when one joined the sections one would see a lovely blend and combinations of color.  Alma who at one time was a draughtswoman in her former life (i.e. before retirement and the awful alzheimer's disease)cottoned on to this easily, finding just the right combination of colours to make her project interesting.

As usual we did take time out to have tea, look out at the lake, comment on the trees, birds, cars etc..plus read some of an article in the National Geographic.  Alma still reads, what she takes in is another story...At one point we were reading about Orca whales having a "feeding frenzy"...when I read it she thought I said "feeding friends",  "no dear she said that word is "frenzy", I said  - what I wonder is frenzy.she just looked at me and said "oh kind of a mess"...well somewhat I thought...it was an uneventful but lovely time, and leaving Alma was quite simple as she had to be toileted, and I could leave easily, putting the Easter Egg I brought on her bureau..and thought well another interesting day..as I always enjoy the people we are with and especially Alma...

Last week during our conversation, I mentioned her daughter Jackie, she said "are you talking about my Jackie",  and was so "on target", but this week, when Jackie waved to her ...she said, "now tell me dear, just what is that girl's name"...this is the heartbreak of Alzheimer's, In any case the heartbreak is there and the problems with this disease..so I took a picture of

      The Ten Commandments of Dementia

1,  Realize that you do the adapting and the modifying of your response to the resident's behaviour.

2. Realize that You enter the resident's reality rather than pull them into yours.

3.  Realize that ONE size does not fit all, when it comes to what will and what will not work for each individual.

4.. Realize that approaches and techniques are not 100% failure-free and that you must learn to be flexible.

5.  Realize that success means adapting the task to whatever the individual's highest level happens to be.

6.  Realize that the process is more important than the net result, and celebrate that process regardless of the outcome.

7.  Realize that you need to "do what it takes" when the tried and true methods have not been effective.

8 Realize that normalization is important in giving residents a sense of participating in their own lives as they see fit.

9. Realize that the family is an equal partner in the caregiving process and that educating them is up to you.

10.  Realize that through your caregiving, you hold the key to success of the resident's journey through this disease and that because of  this, you are a rare and special person

(Taken from the Methodist Home, Chicago, Illinois)

These Commandments are worth reading and using with so many who are going through this life as a person with "dementia", or the person who is considered the "caregiver"...

I'm planning to pass them on to the people in charge here at my own Residence....I hope the reader finds some worth  in these words not only with dementia patients, but with so many others who deserve respect and help.

Wednesday April 12, 2017..Little late posting this week, but I did get to my Monday visit with Alma, and what a beautiful spring/summer day it was.  Although we did a little art...coloring in pre drawn flowers...it was just too lovely outdoors..so out we went.

Alma in a wheelchair, and me pushing it along.  Once we were outside I realized that it was kind of hot for Alma's head so I put my peak cap on her..(I need a peak - having crappy eyes) she was so pleased fixing it in a jaunty style over her eyes.  So we wheeled our way around the courtyard stopping to talk to some of the other patients who were also in wheelchairs.  Alma would point the way and on we would go.  Here is perfect, no too much wind..try over there. Eventually we stopped at a perfect place, then I realized hey she is missing her cup of coffee..Asking another person also with a patient, I checked if she could keep her eye on Alma, while I rushed in for the coffee, so with coffee in hand, peak cap on her head and her white curls, she looked happy and jaunty as she looked up at the beautiful blue sky and lovely white clouds..remarking _"how beautiful "!  This reminded me so much of Mac, it is so perfect for Alzheimer's patients to be outdoors and enjoying they feel at home and I know rarely do they have a problem outdoors, their conversation may be sparse but it usually happy.

As I was wheeling her back to the elevator to return her to her floor, I was pleased to notice she was not complaining of pain in her hip, earlier she was and I thought perphaps it was her wheel chair and tried to find the physio without luck...but then remembered she should have her tylenol pill so checked that out and sure enough it had not been given at the usual time..So obviously it had taken it's effect.  Anyway, as we were waiting for the elevator, along came the deaf student from Mackay
to do her volunteer work. how pleased she was to meet us again.  Always a pleasure to meet my old friends and students from the days of teaching at Mackay..and always a satisfaction to see how these deaf students can cope in a hearing world..

Getting back to Alma I said to her, "Jackie will be joining you soon, but I'll have to leave"..I was so pleased to hear her say "Jackie" ,   My Jackie"   How good she was at recognizing and remembering her daughter, although it isn't always the case, I thought to myself, well Alma is on-target and perfect today.  As I thought this I kind of thoughtlessly started to remove her hat, as I needed it to go home,  Well, she grabbed it, and said "do not do that, it is my hat" You should ask first",   I said, I'm sorry Alma, I then said "oh by the way here are some cookies I brought for you.  The cookies were in a package and in a little bag.  As she grabbed the cookies and the bag I managed to get the hat.  Then said I'm leaving now, but will see you next week.  She said, "fine and be sure to return my hat to me before then."Well for sure nothing got past Alma that day.  I will put commandments for those dealing with Alzheimer's in my next blog.   I for one, after my this little episode, should take the commandments seriously, and remember to always "ask first".