Today, a special day..a celebration of our great grandbaby Lachlan's first birthday..this baby has to be one of the most contented of children..but then why not, he has it all. When I say all, I mean LOVE. Love is what makes the world go round as we know, and it is also what supplies confidence, peace, joy and all the other good things that we need to live a happy life. Well our little Lachlan has that because his life is just permeated with love. How happy he was to take six steps today (sideways) to his dad, and how happy we all were to watch him do this.
When I think of the little children who are in a world with war, disease and hunger I realize just how can they grow up to be happy and peaceful - it is impossible. I don't dwell on this, but it reminds me of how each time Mac would see on t.v. or read in the papers about the situation in other countries, he would just shake his head and say, "this has got to stop, we over here have it all, and unless we share - unless we help and change the situation, our chickens will be coming home to roost", and by this he meant the times will change and the "have nots" will be taking what is rightfully theirs a chance to grow up in a peaceful, loving and caring environment. He always agreed with the slogan "he who is silent, consents"
Anyway, back to happier thoughts, I try to write bits and pieces wherever I am when something interesting or funny is said so I won't forget. As I was writing a birthday gift cheque today,it turned out to be the last in my book..and there I saw a little scrawl, I realized I must have written something that appealed to me and not having paper, or my agenda I guess I used the back of the cheque book..I had to get my magnifying glass I had written it so small. This is what I wrote- "I just tried wiggling into a new bathing suit here in a changing room and I heard Mac's great laugh"..I can't remember if I was in Winners or in a store in Maine, or it could have been in Florida..but I do remember feeling so kind of embarrassed, knowing that the bathing suit was definitely too small, why did I think it would fit..and then I heard the laugh, and said.."I know, I know, I'm not size 8 anymore that's for sure"... So there was my little bit of the past that made me laugh to read it..and how I loved Mac's laugh. For sure that was Mac, there were no men in the changing room.
I was speaking to a woman recently, the wife of our friend Paul, who died, the celebration of his life will be Saturday. She said "I used to say to Paul, please stop running the hot water like that - put a plug in the sink, and save us some money"..Apparently he never did, and the hot water would just run down the drain, this always made her so angry. Well just after he died she woke up to hear the hot water running, she went to the bathroom sink and was only able to turn off the hot water by closing the pipe under the sink. Well, she then said, "O.K. Paul that's enough"..or words to that effect.
I have heard people say that bits and pieces of the voice, the face, or the spirit of our loved ones come back to us after they have gone. I did mention, in another blog, I saw Mac's face over mine when I lay in shavinasta (or whatever it's called) in yoga, but I had completely forgotten his laugh in the changing room till I read that little scribble. It gave me such a feeling of love and joy. I hope he was there in spirit at Lachlan's party, though to be honest I certainly did not have any indication of this, but how he would have enjoyed the party, and of course his great grandson Lachlan and all the family.
There are so many stories of how we try to remember and in so doing may cause these sort of experiences, but I had not been trying to remember Mac in those two episodes, it was really right out of the blue.
Speaking of this, I remember once being on a train, not to long after my dear friend Joslyn died, I was sitting there as the train roared along, peacefully reading a book, when I heard her laugh which was one of the most musical laughs I have ever heard. Without thinking I put my book down, leaped up and started running along the passage through the train, got through two cars before I realized, of course that's not Jos, she is dead..I went sadly back to my seat, wondering , well how did that happen.
Another time, I was at my computer reading an email from my friend Louise, my mom had died quite some time before that...Louise claims to be psychic at times, though I never ask her to give a reading or whatever she does for people. So I was surprised to read, "your mom wants you to know how much she loves you...and that's all your mom said, but then she left chuckling so much. "...Well for one thing my mom was deaf, spoke sign language, so I wondered how Louise heard her say this hmmm???.but what really got to me was Louise writing, "your mom left chuckling" well that was something my mom did, in fact at the residence where she lived before her death...they called her "smiles and chuckles"...so ..all this took place many years ago now.. obviously I haven't had many of these "visitations " or what ever they are called.
But who knows when a bit or piece from the past will come to us..in any case I'm open to it, maybe in a dream, Gaye our daughter dreamt of Mac last night. Gaye said " He was looking for some girl, - and in my dream, I told him the girl's name is Jan." So maybe I'll see him in my dreams...g'nite.
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