David Bowie was interviewed on the Strombo Show, Bowie spoke about how much he injected his feelings of loneliness and that at the end we are truly alone and he put it into his music.
Not knowing too much of Bowie's music, but hearing his words made me think of Mac and how he never complained of loneliness. In work he had his office, his music to listen to, he was one of the first to have a radio in his office. Yet he hardly ever discussed his work. After work he played hockey on a team- ran kid hockey teams. When he retired he could be considered a true loner. He could stay in his office with so many choices of how to spend his time, that is, on the computer working out his investments, doing crossword puzzles up the zing zang, reading poetry and Irish history, working on his family research, working on accumulating great restaurant reviews, he had tons of files on everything from good wines to old pictures of Railway stations that he loved.. Not to mention checking out my stuff,the environmental committee, my Teaching material, Literacy Council, Church in International Affairs, and running our own household affairs...he never seemed to need anyone.
I on the other hand always needed people, I could be alone for whole days, but that would be an exception. Of course, the main person I needed was him and he was always there for me..being happy to be the one important person in my life, and loving to be the person who ran my life.
My stories were his stories, just as the problems and fun with our kids were shared in depth so were the stories of the kids in my class, or my friends and the people I met. Sometimes he would tell my stories as if they were his. Kathy a friend recently said, how fun it was to hear us tell stories, and how I'd say wait a minute Mac, that's my story.
Now I see how much he did for me, as I look at my bank statements and think hmmm now where did I spend that money, hmm which phone service do I have, oh yeah I am with videotron for what, oh yes, t.v., what phone service. Videotron had to tell me, I changed it over to Videotron so they could do everything, but Mac had all this at his fingertips, I went along blithely in a beautiful trance, no wonder I would say, I certainly hope I go first..well that didn't work out.
Today I so wished I could tell him about poor Alice downstairs sitting in her wheelchair hair cut short now, lying there with her huge tummy covered with a lap blanket and shocking the bejesus out of me when I saw her purple and black eye. What the devil hit you I said. Turns out the preposees were giving her a bath and the kind of phone shower thingee hit her in the eyes..Wow, poor Alice, she grabbed my hand and put it on her heart, saying well where were you when I needed you. Well yeah, where was I, did that ever make me think.
Decided then to check out Lina as well, there she was in her semi blindness, sitting in her chair listening to her tape and knitting, but so happy to tell me her latest story. That story kind of made me sad but laugh so much, she had just had her toenails cut, not here I won't say where or who..but the woman who was cutting her toenails all of a sudden, jumped up and ran to the sink washing her face..At first Lina thought she was throwing up, as the woman was pushing her face under the tap, and kind of going ahh; BUT,this is what happened apparently when she clipped Alice's toenail, the little piece of nail jumped up and went straight in her eye..yikes. Then the woman was so rattled she cut a bit of Lina's little toe, (hate to say it but I laughed out loud) now Lina has to have her toe washed and dressed with meds every second day..
Poor Lina (age 91) laughed and said I'm o.k. as I drink a little water from my special cup which comes from the Czech Republic. Intrigued with the cup I took it and there it was with a kind of tea -spout that one sips from; it has a handle like a regular cup, not knowing that it was still filled with water I turned it over to see if it showed Czech republic on the bottom, and spilled it all over myself and the floor. Well the two of us howled with laughter, after using up much of her paper towels, I cleaned the floor, my bag, myself, and took off for my own apartment, wishing I could tell all this to my sweet Mac..so I'm telling it all to my blog.
We are Mac's eternity, so I'm thinking of how he would have laughed too and commiserated with Alice, and Lina. Alice said to me I wish you would buy a pendant put his ashes right in and hang it around your neck, she said I would pet the pendant.(not going to happen.)
Les (our son) is his eternity as well, as he emailed me a picture of Mac's hockey stick and skates, telling me how much fun he had using them today, and saying I don't think I could be on a team now that I'm 62, but his skates fit me perfectly and are just great - he had a great day with his dad's skates on, and his dad's hockey stick marked Mac..
So g'nite Mac, g'nite all.
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