On our way to brush our teeth, that's the question mac asked, Are we going up now.??, where i wondered was he thinking of going up to....It always hits me, usually at bedtime just how it must be for him not to know where he is, or perhaps some memory of how we used to go upstairs to bed may have triggered that idea - i.e. to be going up...but also certain items always must be in place in his mind, but sometimes he has a hard time to describe what he means, and so after brushing his teeth and washing ...he tries to get across just what he is missing and must find...so two items come to mind...his hanky, no that's not it...his wallet...right!!! Don't need to say 'your watch' he has it on and wants to wear that to bed, - no problem.
But he has had a really busy day, which of course he forgot as soon as we returned home...but he did remember the reason we were out all day. Roger Snelling, who worked with him many years ago at CN, died ....we went to Roger's Memorial Service today...so many were there..at St. james united church...and although mac would ask often, where are we going...when i would say to Roger Snelling's memorial service, he always would say..."Oh Roger died, he was much younger than us"..and so he was he was 74 years old and a wonderful friend, Activist a tireless worker for justice as well as supporter of immigrants - poor people and homeless...he helped to have a micro loan org. for those who wanted to start a business in montreal and needed seed money...- and managed to get so many of us involved in his work...so Mac did not forget his old friend, and for sure I, who worked with him on subcommittees for kairos..will never forget him either...
Then to return home to find out that one of the members of our support group...linda, informed me by email that the husband of Anne in our group...died on jan 31...he had alzheimers and had also suffered a stroke...the family had been trying to find a place where he could be placed and be safe...Placed and be safe, are the key words...as I meet and talk to many of the people here, in fact just tonight, a resident, Doreen, was crying, she didn't want to go to bed - it was 7;30 p.m. she was also yelling at the preposee "don't put me to bed" in Englilsh, the preposee, a beautiful young one, was answering in french...I have to leave at 8;30, so I have to put her to bed. i suggested she wait at least 10 more minutes...but how sad it was as Doreen said, thank you dear...she said, I wish my two kids would visit me and tell the preposee what i need - they speak French....but they never visit...maybe they will feel bad when i die...
Well to tell the truth...Mac and i felt bad for her already...but it's not easy, i realize, to work with old people, they are so up and down...and that is natural as their health is also up and down...So for as long as possible, I will try to stay healthy, and make sure Mac is o.k. and has someone with him that knows what he is trying to say, and can help him know where he is going, and where he is...be it up, or down, a hanky or a wallet....and make sure he is safe in his own bed...so now to join him, g'nite.
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