Monday, December 30, 2013 Hey, jesus, it's freezing out here....

And so it was, but we were well dressed, and the only place Mac said he was cold was around his neck so, after fixing his scarf and his zipper up to the top, no problem...but no way was he was going to enjoy the sun on the snow today, so after getting on with our little errand we returned home...shortest walk ever, 30 minutes total...

 Since he had a kind of shaking up on Saturday, thought i better listen to him and get home, as Saturday was a great day, not too cold, snow was melted on the sidewalks,so  i guess I got carried away, and went too far...decided we should go to the lake and over protests from Mac, we did...but on the way home he not only grumbled but was breathing loudly and protesting...by the time we were a block from our residence he was stumbling,  almost falling down ..i'm sure people thought he was drunk or something.....luckily a couple were getting gas at the nearby station, saw our predicament, i was holding him up..so i asked them if they could drive us to the residence...which we could see from where we were, they agreed, and .finally with much shoving and lifting of his feet, we got him in the car and in about 4 minutes back into the residence...

that taught me a lesson, no pushing beyond his desires...From now on if I want to go to the lake and he doesn't, I'll arrange somehow to go on my own...and leave him with someone at home...he is not the same  gung ho guy in the winter any more.  Even with the big A he always prided himself on walking no matter what the weather...guess those days are gone.  So I listened to him today as it was really cold and soon we were home, and cosy in our own space....but then  sundown arrived and he was wondering just when he had to leave this place to go home...following that  he was listening to music on the radio with his eyes closed, I was happily receiving a book i had ordered - when he got up and asked if he should go down to get me two books...he was kind of sleep walking and talking...this he got over soon...and we were able to eat supper and the evening progressed really well...but here are some past episodes

last night he was saying 'where is that guy, he is always here, i said - who knows, guess he is gone...let's brush our teeth...no but where is he...you know the one i mean....answer by me,  no don't really, but if you saw a guy here maybe he'll be back...'yes he is here all the time with me...then i twigged and said are  you talking about janet..yes yes said mac..well I said, that's me..oh thank god - thought you were gone...then when he brushed his teeth happily, went to bed and after taking his meds - said...so good you are here, thought you were gone...this at about 10;00  later at about 10;45 i'm getting in bed, he is still awake,  waiting,  and saying are you sure  you are janet...yes so i held his hand as he was going off to sleep, then took my hand away...'i think we should hold hands all night. he said.'  i replied ..no but I'm here, and want to turn over and sleep...so as  you can see this made my sleep a little uneasy...what happens when i'm not here.

there is  a new man lilving on the 2nd floor his two sons are here almost every day trying to adjust him to be able to stay on 2nd floor,

  it's wonderful to see their devotion, but just learned that their mom died in january of a stroke, so the real caregiver has gone and the sons are kind of playing it by ear, but are frustrated...want him to  have a preposee take him down for lunch etc, but he is on pureed food also does not start conversations..they want mac to be with him to talk - but mac does not usually ininiate conversations either..also we do not go down for meals, only about 2 times  a week..they are on to the staff constanty saying if preposees can take care and bring down the others on other floors, he should be able to go down for dinner etc too..i understand where they are coming from, and that is why i keep mac with me...  Sooo my only problem these days is worrying about how he will be when if i'm not here....

 

Guess i'll just put those thoughts away, relax and just do the best I  can..it's  time for bed, g'nite

Thursday, December 26, 2013.....Who sent us that card....

We are still getting cards and today we got one with a letter - Mac noticed and asked who sent it, well it was from an old friend - actually a girl whose parents and mine were close - so she was more like a cousin...and since she put us up to date about her life, I thought i'd just copy and paste my update to her in this blog, so for those of you who know all about us, this will be kind of a bore, so you can just stop now...

 

Hi Anna,

Just received your Christmas card and letter putting us up to date with your life , thanks so much.  I can't recall if i sent you a card - hope so - keep busy with mac so not always on target...Although..this move has been a good one for Mac and I, as you probably remember he has Alzheimers and here we have help in so many ways , i.e. an aide gets Mac  ready for the day and another gets him ready for night..and there is a nursing staff if necessary, meals etc, although i do most of our meals  we do go to the dining room about twice a week..

 

Somehow i seem to be going all the time, if I'm not washing clothes, i'm getting him ready to go out for a walk - baking, or visiting , going to doc or dentist etc.but the big thing is walking, which he is not keen to do in this weather, actually I'm not either i'd rather be skiing, but walking is so good for both of us..we don't go too far before we are both enjoying the cold fresh air -if it's too cold there is a shopping center nearby, he needs the walk, it stimulates his brain, actually mine too.  In these cold days it's great to come home to hot chocolate and cookies.

 

We love the ambiance here in lachine, not too far from the lake - it's heavenly in the summer...Sundays Mac and i walk to our beautiful St. Stephens heritage church (it's anglican) and really tiny about 40 pews in a stone bldg. 191 years old...he still does not like church but sits in the back quietly with me-too cold for him to sit outdoors which he did in the spring, summer and fall.  Christmas eve service was lovely and for once the church was filled up.

 

The people in the church are so so caring, .  of course we can't walk there in this weather,from our home here on 32nd to  church on 12th,  but someone usually come for us and brings us back.  Wednesdays we go to a study group,  mac does not participate, but sits and listens, once he said at the end...so much blah blah, and so little thought....which on some days is  so right.

 

The Seniors club -  The Teapot is on the lake at the bottom of our street...has a special bus to take seniors  shopping once a week,we have used this a couple of times - there's  a fun group of people and many different activities...we get there about once a week - this January there is special dinner for those whose birthdays are from Oct. to Jan.  Mac's bd is in jan. so we will probably go ...we already knew people here in Lachine, before we moved so that was, in a sense,  a really easy choice of location. 

 

There are also activities in our building, yoga, exercise class, bingo, oko - a kind of bingo with cards - music therapy with a neat guitar playing man called Richard, a library, birthday party day once a month...mac is not into these activities,except the music,  actually i'm not keen on bingo either..but we do the exercise and also at times  yoga but i prefer to go to yoga at the Dorval Community center.  .i have a respite person who looks after Mac - once a week - usually Tuesdays - have different functions i attend such as Book Club, Alzheimer's support meetings, and visit with friends... 

 

So that's about it for how we spend our days...our family had a great time this christmas, we are about 28 people with all the grankids and their boyfriends and girlfriends, plus i think you know we have a great grandaughter, Finley, who is really precious...We get to see one or another of the kids every weekend, either we go for dinner or they come here, and with so many in the family we always have a birthday to celebrate besides the usual holiday celebrations

 

Living with someone who has Alzheimer's is a challenge , but as I always say, rather be with Mac then without, so this is the best situation for us...there is a 2nd floor for those whose case is too hard for a spouse or partner to manage..and although i know it's there and may have to have Mac there some day, i'm not at that place yet - and live in the  hope it will never happen.  Mac is humourous and mostly fun to be with, of course many times  out of it, cranky, miserable,not always able to express himself, and definitely needs care, physically and mentally, but still loving and lights up my life, so that's it for this Christmas...

 

bye for now...love, janet  

 

 

 

Monday, December 23, 2013 There is a peanut....

What on earth could have made Mac wake up  or sleep walk and talk - saying There is a peanut, with nothing in it...we must get it....."  nothing i could say would make him stay in bed, he was out to get that peanut...putting his slippers on and yanking all the covers off the bed, (while I'm yanking them back on and saying, pleeeze pleeze get back to bed)....finally he got  back in, only to get up again, this time more urgently, "we must get that - the peanut has nothing in it and it's going to burn' - 'not to worry, it won't burn - i said with an edge to my voice..but that of course doesn't get through to him in this state, and so it went up and down from the bed....blankets on blankets off.  This all started about 11;00 pm. continuing on and off till 3;00 a.m.

I've been trying to think of what causes this business - i.e. sleepwalking and talking...one thing is that our preposee who got him ready for bed last night came in - most agitated ...pouring perspiration and showing me her soaking wet shoes socks and edges of her slacks...apparently a man in Tower A. sat on the toilet and - BROKE IT....causing water etc. to flow all over the floor...she and a nurse quickly took blankets and sheets towels and whatever they could to try to stop the flow...till finally they got someone - apparently a handy man, the janitor not on duty Sunday night....and so there she was practically crying..saying she had 7 more people to get ready for bed after she finished with mac - and her shoes were soaken....Well lucky for her we wear almost same size shoe so i lent her my runners and socks...put her's on the baseboard heater to dry....so this was the scenario before bedtime...so perhaps he was feeling the agitation - who knows...

This evening, while trying to get someone - mainly another preposee to help my friend the one with all the infirmities - i.e. rheumatoid arthitis, can hardly move with her shapeless hands and frozen inplace legs - in her wheelchair) there she was poor Muriel  sitting in her own excrement for about 1/2 an hour till fnally got someone there - total time one hour i managed to ask the night nurse. while running around for the preposee .for some idea of what I should do.re mac's problem....he was completely unable to give me any kind of idea other than to suggest i give him an adivan..sic  ...so i said could he bring one to me before bedtime, - yes he would...well it's now 10;05 no adivan and mac is in bed and sleeping...so guess i will phone but i'm wondering if I should take a chance ...i'd like to know just how it reacts with the kind of meds Mac already takes before bedtime..

We have been reading about the abuse in elder homes, but it seems to be everywhere and i think it's partly because the places do not have enough staff...my friend muriel told me she had a harder time getting bathroom help at the lakeshore General Hospital...apparently in this place it happens but not all the time, but there it was par for the course...yikes...

We have a new resident whose two sons are so caring, and they were telling me that the nurse would take their dad's blood pressure every morning for about a week the first week, now he doesn't  bother...they wanted to know if mac had his done...'No - but then they never did in the first place..their dad is on the 2n'd floor, and really wanting to go home...his name is Tony...they want Mac to be a friend to Tony...it's not working at present..but will try again tomorrow.  The son said to me 'I love this guy (his dad) to bits, and can't stand to see him alone with all the people staring in space on the 2nd floor...'  well that's the way, both Tony and Mac are but we talk to them, don't leave them alone, and I know to many, Mac must appear to be just a body sitting there..because that's the way I felt about Tony, till i started to try different questions and wait for something to make him pick up and take note and then answer  -

This is such a sad situation...I hear more and more disheartening stories...and I'm so wondering how it must be for those who do not have the wherewithall to put their loved ones in a place like this where we do have help-it's not the same for everyone...Tony for instance is in a wheelchair, can't eat solid food, is in diapers, but is fairly perky....others can walk, but can't talk, can eat anything and others have to be fed...and so it goes..but
 all have the big A...all have families..but I can only notice about 5 families out of all the people with the big A. here that come on a regular basis and talk, walk, and try to stimulate their loved one...i remember when my cousin at 90 had the big A.  I thought when i visited, well not much point in coming - she really doesn't know me, well now I know better and it's so important for their morale, and one can really see a difference when a person takes their time - talks normally and demonstates some interest in the patient with A...as certainly our table mates at dinner have gotten more response from mac than anyone, and with some really kind of insulting comments, but i guess it's better than being ignored...well - not going to ignore Mac now myself, will get to bed and hope the darn nurse does not come with the pill and wake me up....g'nite..

Friday, January 20, 2013 I'm not hungry.....

Because Mac rarely knows what time it is, or if it's time to get up, go to bed etc....he was not the least bit interested in going to the Christmas Party Dinner given by the staff of our Residence...The Floralies...Could easily understand this as he had a fairly busy day, starting with going to Raymond...his barber of over 40 years...then shopping with me at the Grocery Store...each of these activities is,  for Mac, a mixed blessing...anything new - i.e. getting a haircut...is upsetting..and he always says..no way...Going to the Grocery store can be overwhelming when it's crowded and noisy...Christmas music etc...but once he was involved in both these activities, he was fine. 

Raymond his barber not only drove us to his home where his barber shop now is, but conversed with Mac - which is so good.  As Oliver Sacks says - people do not consist of memory alone, people have feelings, imaginagion, drive, will and moral being...thus Alzheimer's disease does not stop a person needing what makes him feel happy and contented...he needs contact with friends and family - and to feel secure and comfortable..Raymond certainly does that for Mac...and he also drove  us to the grocery store and picked us up, as it was so windy and snowy...and although Mac never really knows for certain who I am...yet as he get's in the front seat of the car, he always says,  Jan, are you there... to make sure I'm in the back seat...this always makes me wonder...but certaily it is security for him that I am there....

So at 5;00 p.m. when I told him, hey let's go it's the turkey dinner party..."I'm not hungry..it's time for bed..."...well no it's only 5:00 p.m. he couldn't believe it...but fnally he did see his watch and the digital time, so agreed to go down to the dining room...There too he was so secure..sitting with Edith who taunts him and says, look you got your food all over your napkin.. one would think he would hate that..but NO, he laughs and tells her "watch it..i'll get something all over you'...chatted with the staff and I just realize again  how much this place and the people in it are so good - not only for Mac but for many of the residents...

Later we had a great party..with an entertaining singer and loads of dancing...staff were terrific dancing with people who looked like they would rather be asleep. but once moving to the music...they revive and enjoy..we for sure really enjoyed, in fact I danced holding mac's hand as he sat and moved his feet as did the man next to him who also held my hand.... Many of the regular non ill  and non- physically handicapped people and visitors were there, singing in both languages and dancing...  Till Mac said to me...'ok it's enough' it was and we happily went up to our apartment, and for a change...Mac didn't think we were on a train..knew where his bed was and is now peacefully sleeping...so time to join him in slumberland..a great day.g'nite.

Monday, December 16, 2013 It's bloody cold.....

And so it was, mac said it like it was - really cold, as we went out for our usual walk, but didn't get too far, as although the snow has been cleared off the sidewalks - the really good thing about living on a busy street - the snow gets cleared pronto...Mac moaned and groaned about how cold it was on his face...actually the sun was great and he was dressed so warmly the only place he could feel the cold was on his nose and eyes, as i had put the scarf up high and he had a helmet type lined fake fur hat....of course i was also dressed warmly and really enjoyed the short walk...but that is all it was - to the shopping center next door and back.

This was a stay in or a nothing going on day, but with Christmas cards and buying gifts i thought at last I could concentrate on trying to see if mac gets it..Christmas  ...that is...Well it's hard to say...as he certainly joins in when i sing Christmas Carols, and even makes fun of them...i try to see if talking  of Christmas when he was younger would trigger some memory, but no, that seems to be really gone...

Watching a little boy smile for the camera on Santa's knee...this usually would bring some comments, but he just said 'cute"  and then come on....we don't want to be here all day...so i'm finding his curiosity and his interest in what's going on is slipping away, and the only thing still there when we walk is his love of the sun......how beautiful it is...this is also the case here in the apartment....the new little tree all covered with ornaments and tiny lights....does nothing for him, the cards and the decoration in the hall, again no comments...but the sun going down making the sky all shades of pinks and rose...that drew comments as it does every night.....and in the morning as well as he eats breakfast...

A typical day today, with giving him directions to the bathroom and helping him when he needs it, answering his comments on who lives in this house, and who owns it, and isn't this Chateauguay, and wouldn't it be good to be in St. Henri..and of course the usual, I don't have a cent...i wonder where i can get some money.looking for his mom..visiting our friend who is feeling much better,  to say goodnight, and watching 'the voice.' in fact listening to music most of the day...is about the best stimulus ...but it's always a delight when he does reacte and say appropriate comments, and so when we were at our friends room, i was yawning....he said,  o.k. let's go time for bed...' i was thrilled, an absolutely on target thing to say...and so it is time for bed.....for sure now...g'night.

Saturday, December 14, 2013 I'm so sorry.....

Reading the gazette these days is almost impossible - just never seem to be able to do this, but tried today and although i didn't finish the article it is so meaningful and i will get back to it...all about one woman's struggle to keep her husband in the hospital, he is suffering from the big A. as well as other problems and the hospital want's to dismiss him...she mentions how it is so hard she has had him home for 3 years and talks about the difficulties as one can't tell what may happen next, and especially in the sundown syndrome, she is so right.  Yesterday's little scenario started about 3;30, kind of early but it was a dull day although we did get out for a walk the sun seemed to leave about then...and sure enough so did Mac's recognition of ME.....

He decided he wanted to leave the apartment and search for his wife...so I went along with this, and as we went downstairs on the elevator, I tried to convince him that hey, that's me, I'm Janet your wife, but he would just laugh and say "cut it out....you are not Janet', and so as not to antagonize him, I just said, oh well I thought i was...and we continued down to the lobby...where he waved or kind of salutes different people, and as we approaced the little enclosure where people sign in, the receptionist gave her usual big smile, and waved - saying "Hi Mr. Mac", and he gave his usual salute...and said "I'm looking for my wife'  she kind of laughed and said pointing to me "she is your wife',  he looked at me and just laughed...i said, - "he doesn't think so tonight'...with that Elena, stepped out of the booth, walked around to him and said. with her hand on his shoulder  she said 'Mr Mac,look at me,  you know me right?   he said "yes'   she added, "Do you trust me',  he said "sure', she said, "Well - this is your wife, Janet.  She helpes you, She loves you, Do you believe me?"  With that he said "yes, turned to me and said - with a kind of sheepish grin  "I'm so sorry'...and as we walked away with me giving a thumbs up sign to Elena - he said, I think I was in a deep sleep and didn't wake up till she talked to me loudly...I guess I'm crazy...I said, well no   then said,   hmmm"well maybe just a little, and he said   "hey wait a minute....there' and we both laughed...

This kind of scenario ended so happily, but it's not always the case, sometimes he cries as he mourns his mom, even tonight he was saying "did you see my mom',  i said, "no not lately'   that seemed like a good answer as he replied, "me neither, i thought i saw her, I wish I could find her",  I agreed and mentioned it would be nice to see all our families, our sisters and your brother...then he added and my Mother...finally i was able to bring the conversation to "yes and to be able to play hockey again, remember your skates went to Leslie...''oh did they...then we went to Lacrosse, which he just loved, so then he thought  "hey maybe I will fool around with the lacrosse stick this summer,  I answered, sure why not...

We then managed to have a light dinner....and he couldn't believe it was dinner time, , Well what did we do all day...  Couldn't believe he had been with me at our friend Dorothy's.  "Don't you recall watching me swim in her pool...'no way- 'yes way..."well how did that happen, how did we get there...and so it went on, as i told him how we had a wonderful lunch - more like a dinner - he had sliced lamb potatoes lovely cream of zuchini soup...(just a note here her chef at her residence is great, ours is well ours makes edible food, her's makes a super deluxe dinner) but i still like our apartment and location better, so one can't have everything, and anyway, I like to cook...but getting back to mac's memory...his day had disappeared into who knows where...but thankfully, he is still here and now peacefully sleeping (hope)...so better check that out - g'nite.

Sunday, December 8, 2013.. you're looking a bit fat....

In answer to the emails i received re; my bad day, here is an answer to one that kind of covers how it is now:

Thanks for your emails, i have been meaning to reply and in one of your emails you mention that you wonder how i get time to pee....so true..and when i do i take my book in with me....don't get time to read the newspapers or books until mac's in bed, it's crazy as he really doesn't push me to give him attention, but i feel he needs to have attention otherwise he sits and veges and i need to feel that he is in the here and now.so i try to read him stuff, hold his hand and dance to the music we listen to, especially the blues at night on cbc...hardly watch t.v., tho try to see the big bang, as its one show i get that's kind of fun...

 

What's kind of sad is he doesn't really feel any kind of link to mandella, and we used to support the ANC by buying badges...and contributing to the cause, we still have a badge with mandella's picture when he was young with Free Mandela, and another with Combat apartheid,in two langages on an ANC flag...

 

Though he is aware that our friend from downstairs that we used to visit for 15 min every night is not there,  (she is in hospital still and now has pneumonia) strange though he always says - he is not in his room, i say, mac,  SHE is not in her room. then he says oh yes she's a lady...sometimes he really gets the gender of people mixed up.....especially if they wear pants - have short hair,  even myself, he will say you ARE a girl right?

 

Anyway, i am o.k. now but it was sweet how he would say every 5 min after i returned  'what happened'   i'd tell him and then he'd ask again, until I said...o.k. i'm fine, no more saying "what happened...'just hug me and then we'll have some flat ginerale'

 

Right now i can't have anything sweet darn....as i've just had a root canal yesterday..and my mouth is still sore,   well it's 10;25 p.m. - will hop in bed and read my book...Brother I'm dying by Edwidges Dandicat...haitian american writer...2 of our people for mac are Haitian, but since they read only in French, they can't borrow the book....

 

Well did hop in bed, and just finally falling off to sleep when mac woke up with saying its 757, i said no it's 12:30...then realized as he started pounding the bed, that he was asleep - or sleep talking and up but not "with it"

That continued as he kept saying "Jesus, then jesus christ and over and over, and then if I said look things look better in broad daylight, lie down and try to sleep, he'd say WOULD YOU SHUTUP...so decided i would and finally he lay down - went back to sleep and I lay awake till after 3;00 a.m.

 

But all was well today, a glorious sunny one, so we went for our walk for an hour in the sun...with mac fairly on target,...and after dinner tonight so on target that he said   'hey you're looking a bit fat..."  well guess whose in trouble now...ha.

 

So the person that's looking a bit fat, will jump in bed with skinny, and hopefully skinny  won't be taking the lord's name in vain in the wee small hours  or fatty will be upset..g'nite. 

 

December 6, 2013 Friday...... Sure that's o.k.....anytime...

We have had a week of ups and downs as usual but it's unusal to be ME who has the ups and the downs personally, so it was kind of good of Mac to say, Sure that's o.k...anytime...when i told him "look just for a change I'm going to leave you on the 2nd floor this morning, Richard (music therapist) will be there with his guitar...'Well where are you going',  "I'm going for root canal work at the specialist is that o.k. with you...Sure that's o.k....I'll be back before lunch...Mac's answer, 'anytime'...well that was a nice change and I actually left him quite contentedly sitting with a group of A. patients downstairs all with their eyes closed, waiting for Richard...of course when I got back he wasn't so happy, but got over it fairly quickly...especially when I gave him his favourite these days...hot chocolate, made with milk and coconut milk...Don't know if I have mentioned this before but coconut is supposed to be very good for Alzheimers, some say it makes a big difference, well i have noted such a big difference, but anything that will help to increase his abilities, true or not, i'm trying it out.

Along with a sore mouth I have had an uneasy tummy...since Tuesday when i went to an Alzheimer Support meeting at the Alzheimer office (this is a meeting we support people attend,) my group meets every first Tues of the month...I managed to get my respite person Debbie and there i was on the 191 bus on my way, when all of a sudden, for no good reason that i could think of my mouth started to fill up with water and boom up chucked into my hand...ran to the bus driver who didn't have anything but a piece of brown napkin, so i grabbed it, said do you have a garbage..'hey he said take that away i don't want that near me...so i stuffed it in my pocket and boom up my tummy reacted again...so busdriver was near a bus stop and he stopped and i got off and whooped it into a little snow bank...got back on the bus...the third stop for the same thing, i said, to the busdriver ...o.k. i'm not getting back on, and off he went on happily without me, There i was this side of nowhere and I felt i was throwing up my whole insides....

Just then a lovely looking blonde lady drove into the parking lot at this nowhere place, she saw me throwing up but drove on in, so i followed her and when she stopped i ran up to her car saying, what street are we on, i want to phone for a taxi...She said through a closed window 'GO AWAY'  well not only did i continuoe to retch, but now I'm crying as well...as i stumbled along to the next parking place when i saw her go into a building s I followed her, saying "Please help me."   She just screamed, NO, and where is everybody," we were in a small porch, that had code punch thingies..so i walked out, coninued crying and retching, she came out and i said, through my hiccups, "never said this to anyone before, but you are a B----h..."....and i tried phoning my daughter Val...and while i spoke to her or was trying to,  a man in the next office  of a building saw me and said, 'it's o.k. lady, I'll call a taxi for you...wait there...'  well what a nice Black guy he was, he brought me a roll of toilet paper while i continued my throwing up of nothing...he gave the address, I was on a kind of service road of N otre Dame st. W. and that's when i met an angel in disguise as a Taxi driver.

He held me while i threw up nothing again, helped me and my toilet paper roll into the car...and quietly said, o.k. relax, where are we going, i cried my address out to him - wiped my face and leaned back...then i proceeded to hear two lovely stories that distracted me completely from myself...This he said when i told him how super he was to help me like that...he said,  did you hear about the wonderful animals - think they were monkeys or guerillas that helped a little baby in the jungle..and even brought her up, as her parents had died there...'no i said, - he said...look on the internet...then he continued with a story about this man he said maybe yiou know the name  'jesus'  i didn't answer, as he just kept talking  saying , this man was crucified but the jewish people don't do that on the sabbath, so they took him off this cross, his friends put him in a kind of a grotto, where they thought he was dead, but he wasn't he got up the next day and walked out...he showed some people his hands with nail holes, and they were surprised.  BUT, he didn't stay there, he went across the sea, to india, where he lived the rest of his life, his name changed, just like me  my name is Marabek (think he said) but people here don't pronounce it properly so my name is changed ..anyway, you can go to the city he went to in india (forget the name)  his gravestone is there with the two names....

By then i was back at my place, and quite amazed at the stories and could actually ask how much i owed him.  he said what it was, and i paid and then said, 'what religion are you anyway, he said, well i celebrate all the religious holidays of all religiions, but i am Muslim....(though i don't really follow the religion), i said, I think  you do, you are a muslim angel...and as we shook hands and said goodbye..he said, remember all the religiions lead to the same God...

Well when i came in the apartment, Debbie and Mac surprised to see me, i just hugged mac, and said, I'm sick...but i'm getting better, and how lovely to have Mac hug me and say 'hey what happened'...

Monday, December 2, 2013...Now I feel better....

We are having a busy time of it, going to our house in Chateauguay, to make sure we have things given to the right people and bringing home what we want.  Fortunately, Deb, our homecare worker and friend has found many thing she wants there, so that's great.  Managed to get stuff to the St. Vincent de Paul, check out Communitaire Chateauguay to pick up what's left - all this while Mac is saying can't we just go, what do we care - but now i'm seeing why ... he really is tired and what is more coughing....he could hardly stand up at 8;30 p.m. and was practically asleep on his feet.  So once we got him in bed, he said, 'now i feel better...so now I feel worse, as I'm hoping he is not getting anything - especially not the flu..as he refused to take his flu shot..which is a first..he always took it before.  That's one  of the problems with living in a seniors residence where many of he people are not in tip top shape...and ambulances come and go....

This is what i wrote to put in my blog yesterday....

well another downer -another friend here not well.... i mentioned last night to my friend Muriel in transition room, that Dec 1 i would bring her a little gift , a small table wreath with a candle in the middle, and when we get together in the evening for approx 15 - 30 min before they put her to bed, we will feel christmassy talking by candle light.  This afternoon went down to check her out and tell her the candle light conversations would begin monday night as we would probably get home too late from the birthday party for daughter gaye. -

 

Was so sad, to fine she is back in hospital that makes 3 x in 4 weeks....she has tummy prblms can't seem to hold down her food....she has pains constantly - rheumatoid arthritis,  can hardly scratch her ear or move her hands- sleeps with her knees up as she can't put them straight...it's awful. but  her mind is great and lovely...and i'm praying that she will be well, but 87 and so many health problems it's an uphill battle for her.

 

So here it is the night we were to have our candlelight conversation...well it probably,would not have taken place anyway, with Mac  so tired...but who knows...he hates it if i'm doing something he can't really partake in, like playing a dice and card game - which i did at 6;30 p.m.  i try to get him involved as its a very simple game..but no way, he just sat and sulked..and then at 7:30 when we left he just steadily went into sleepy mode until he finally got in bed.  saying I'm so happy to be with you, don't leave me, i feel safe when  you are here...i said i haven't been away from you for one minute all day.  You had supper with our friends in the dining room, had a great time, and we are now in our apartment...so relax and enjoy your bed.  he said, yes i sure will...are you coming to bed,

in a bit i replied....just going to answer emails but forget that....

 I'm kind of tired now as well so guess i'll take my book in there and join him, g'nite.....